Are you THAT guy with your email marketing? Photo by Dorian Gray/istockphoto.com

We all have THAT friend. You know, the one who only calls or emails when they need something. A place to crash. A few bucks. A very big problem they must analyze endlessly for hours at a time (and they never take your advice, leading to a continuing saga of very big problem that they dissect endlessly).

Answer this question honestly. Are you THAT friend with your email marketing? (Ouch! That smarts!)

My inbox is loaded with missives about why I need to donate to XYZ company. Or why I need to take a monologue class with a fancy pants director I have never heard of. Or why I should buy tickets to ABC company’s must see production. Hurry! Tickets selling fast!

The problem is, based on the one-way correspondence, I don’t feel compelled to hand over my hard-earned dollars as a donation, for a class or for this must-see production. (Incidentally, every show email is a “must see” production, so must-see just doesn’t cut it anymore.)

Worse, for most of these lists, my email was either poached from another list or found on an industry contact sheet. I did not ask to receive these emails, but I am. Yeah, I can opt out blah blah. But that’s not the point.

The point is, you should make each and every email you send worth the reader’s time. Instead of an endless barrage of emails when you want something, how about sending monthly emails that share something with me? Make it worth my time to open up your emails. (And, sorry, a ticket discount is not worth my time.)

In other words, prove it. Prove that I should pay attention to you.

Give me a laugh and brighten my day, make me passionate about something, teach me something I didn’t know! Make receiving your emails a pleasure, not an alt-delete chore that I do every morning.

Show me that you are smart, funny, clever and engaging in my inbox. I will be much more interested in seeing if you are smart, funny, clever and engaging on stage as well.

So, here’s your Smarties Challenge. In the comments, I want to a 6 month email plan from YOU! 6 emails, 1 per month, where you engage your email list! You have one week! Comments close on Wednesday, July 7.

On Thursday, July 8th, I will pick a “winner” (via random.org). The winner receives a 45 minute phone consultation/PR strategy session with yours truly. So let’s hear it!